Amandatti “Datti” Rosa Kapella was born in Manila, The Philippines under the astrological sign of Virgo in September, 1954.  Later in life her femme name came to her, and she thought it sounded pretty cool – being somewhat derived from her given name was a plus.  The name’s Middle-Eastern flavor reflects her darker complexion, exotic nature, introspective self, and desire for the pursuit of perfection.

 

She has lovely brown eyes, raven black hair that is just starting to gray and has hints of natural red highlights.  She stands five feet eight inches tall with an athletic build.

 

Datti started crossdressing at an early age.  She thought of herself as strange and different, and she wondered if she was gay or bisexual.  She imagined herself being a biological female.

 

Over the years she thought a lot about why she is what she is.  Her self exploration caused her to look deeply into herself and evaluate and develop some thoughts to help answer her own questions.

 

Fundamentally, why is anyone the way they are?  A product of society?  Genetics?  Environment? Sociological? Psychological?  Physiological?  Divine intervention or design?  The answer is likely a combination of all of those things. And, since those facets are too vague to quantify, Datti tended to ignore the question of ‘why she is.’  She focused, instead, on ‘what she is’ and continues to understand its meaning.

 

Datti has been married to Jennie for over twenty-eight years.  They live in the country southeast of Denver, with their two dogs, cat, and two horses. Datti kept her crossdressing a secret from her wife for the first sixteen years of their marriage.

 

Datti is both musically and vocally talented.  She plays keyboard, guitar, and drums.  “I love the blues!” she exclaims.  In addition, she plays in a band specializing in classic rock and blues.  She played football in college and spent almost ten years in the US Air Force. She served by flying a desk as systems analyst and also served as a Combat Controller performing several operations requiring a very specific and specialized skill set. She awarded the Bronze Star for Valor as a result of one of her more harrowing assignments.

 

Now she enjoys horseback riding, music, golf, and skiing.  Being an avid skier, Datti is a certified ski instructor and has volunteered her time as a ski instructor for the disabled since 1988 at the National Sports Center for the Disabled and since 1998 with the VA and DAV sponsored National Disabled Veterans’ Winter Sports Clinic.

 

Having an MS in Physics and a Ph.D. in Computer Science, Datti provides consultation to the U.S. Government on space systems, which is almost like being a rocket scientist.

 

In March of 2000, Datti accepted herself as being a crossdresser.  Not long after, she made contact with Tri-Ess.  In August of the same year, she informed her wife, Jennie. “It was very scary,” Datti recalls, “I didn’t know how she was going to react.  I was pleased and surprised she was accepting.”

 

Datti hit the ground running.  She worked with a group of crossdressers in Denver and helped to build a new Tri-Ess chapter – Tau Sigma Kappa (TSK). As a group, TSK worked hard to satisfy national requirements and received their charter in November of 2001.  That first year saw a lot of activity in the Denver area.  There were outings into mainstream places and relationships being formed with local businesses.  Datti found that most places are welcoming and supportive. As Second Lady in TSK, Datti worked to establish a variety of venues for its members to visit.  That variety attracted new members who felt they, too, could emerge from their shelters into the bright world of mainstream society.  With the focus being to “go and do what you would if you were not crossdressed,” TSK membership grew and their presence in the community flourished.

 

Helping TSK grow is a team effort.  With all of the members of TSK pulling in, the Denver chapter achieved Flagship status in its first year of existence.  In fact, TSK has been a Tri-Ess Flagship chapter ever since.  Datti served as Second Lady for three years and then as First Lady for one year.  Stepping down to allow others to serve, Datti focused her attention on outreach and education. Now, after 12 years, TSK is still a Flagship chapter and Datti has been serving as its First Lady.

 

Denver’s Gender Identity Center (GIC) hosts an annual conference for the transgender community.  Datti attended her first Gold Rush in 2001 and has continued her attendance and involvement.  She was one of their featured speakers, providing an overview of the transgender spectrum – giving the audience the language for understanding the phenomenon a little better.

 

While education within the GLBT community is beneficial, it is also important to reach others in mainstream society – for education’s sake as well as to reach those closeted crossdressers who would not otherwise know of the existence of support groups.  Datti worked with another crossdresser, Jeanine Williams, in establishing an outreach program within TSK.  With their first presentation to a Front Range Community College sociology class in the Fall of 2001, crossdressing in Colorado took its first steps into “polite society.”  From those early beginnings, Datti averages two presentations a month to local schools, businesses, colleges, and universities. To her credit, she was: an alternate speaker for the 2003 National Conference on Race and Ethnicity (NCORE);  a speaker at the Matthew Shepard Symposium in Laramie, Wyoming in 2005; the facilitator of a transgender workshop for the Out and Equal conference in Denver in 2005; and a presenter at the Diversity Conference at Colorado State University in September of 2005.

 

After the Holiday en Femme (HEF) in Chicago (2001), Jane Ellen Fairfax invited TSK to host HEF in Denver in 2003.  A daunting proposition for sure.  TSK accepted.  The event is now used as the benchmark against which other events are measured.  Later, Datti was invited to join the Tri-Ess National Board as the Director of Events Planning and Outreach.  She was also invited to hold a seat on the Tri-Ess Board of Governance.  Datti accepted both invitations.

 

Throughout the growth and evolution in Datti’s persona, Jennie has been a supportive and cooperative partner. During the 2004 Holiday en Femme in Fayetteville, Arkansas, a newspaper article entitled, “Group Seeks to Find Second Self: National Organization Provides Support, Inspiration for Area Cross-Dressers,” by Amy M. Cotham of The Morning News, published an interview with Jennie.

 

"I felt he was still the same person I had been married to for 15 years," Jennie Kapella said.  She added the news was shocking, and she was initially fearful of other secrets her husband might be keeping. She also wondered if the cross dressing meant he was gay. "But, if you become educated," Jennie Kapella said, "you realize what it is really about.  You also realize what took them so long to tell you. […] Cross dressing won't break up a marriage," she added, "unless there are other things wrong.  If it is a good relationship, you can survive."

 

After telling her wife, Jennie, Datti feels closer to her than before.  “Love is certainly a wonderful thing and my wife has shown me unquestioned love and devotion.  Sure, she doesn’t completely understand…especially the bit about wanting to wear women’s clothes, but she recognizes that I have a need to express my femininity in those ways.”

 

Today, Datti is an active spokesperson for crossdressers and transgender individuals.  She speaks from personal experience and personal research.  Blending her outgoing style, inwardly-borne confidence, and her desire to take crossdressing out of the closet, Datti pushes the envelope in hopes that, someday, the closet will only be a place to hang clothes.